Mark of the Ninja: Remastered Review

Mark of the Ninja: Remastered is, well, nothing short of the masterfully made stealth side-scroller. It's essentially what you'd see if you would actually give the task of perfecting a 2D Stealth game to its utmost limits, although…

My opinion on the game is QUITE controversial if I would like to say so myself, but listen, it's something DEFINITELY worth reading and it's NOT something to waste your time what-SO-ever. Yeah.

Now, to finally get into the topic of a wonderful, well-constructed opinion about this game. It… fucking SUCKS??!?!! Why the FUCK would anybody enjoy playing this DUMBASS shitstain of horrid game design? The only good thing about it is the good-looking graphics, and maybe, MAAAAA~AAAYBE the hottie following you around as you play . Either way, the thing that pushed me over the edge in this game and made me write this masterpiece of a review was the third fucking level, the third level. The. Fucking. THIRD. LEVEL. It's total bullshit, honestly, the game giving you a fucking false hope, as the hottie ninja girl that follows you around TELLS YOU that you can spare a certain enemy, a courier, which is A FUCKING LIE!!!!!!!!!!! Every single time you try to ACTUALLY spare the FUCKING BASTARD, you rip his fucking arm off instead and you're simply fucked over by the goddamn alarm, no stealth there whatsoever. Thought it was a stealth game? Too bad, we're changing into a FUCKING ACTION GAME NOW, TALLY-HO, FUCKING DEGENERATE. Hoooo~LY SHIT. It's the prime example of terrible, terrible game design and it's the most fucking AGGRAVATING thing you could ever hear of in a fucking game for the love of god I swear. It's made me want to walk over to the game's dev company, fucking GIANT 18 inch dildo IN HAND, and shove it up their goddamned arseholes.

Oh yeah, this also wasn't really me writing an angry review, I just wanted to say I would like to have gay sex with the employees and boast about my brand new dildo . Sorry guys :333333 <3 bad-dragon.com they sell like the best dildos on the market holy shit, def bring one to your next local furry orgy.