Fallout

The Dumbest Vault Dweller (Fallout 76)

fallout 7 - The Dumbest Vault Dweller (Fallout 76)

Okay, not entirely proud of this story but I'm bored and this story comes to mind, so lets get on with it. So about over LV70 and thinking I'm at the end of the so called main campaign of the game, I think it was about time to get myself a nuke. Thankfully with the codes I've been gathering for a bit I managed to collect enough for Charlie. So with the codes and all that I "prepared" myself, thinking that this was something that you need a group for and I mostly go solo.

So pretty much I gathered up nearly every legendary weapon I had for this trip, a Gatling Plasma with the Suppressor effect, the once loved and sought out Furious Gatling Laser (at least to my knowledge back in my F4 days), Black Diamond that was at its highest level, and my lever-action rifle. Firstly, I needed the keycard from the cargo bot and let me tell you it's a bi*ch to get. Not because of difficulty, but because how the game tries to fu*k me over. Now at first, I managed to locate one in Watoga, and while I was trying to shoot it down…I fell, into one of those ditches. But I didn't just fell down into one of those ditches…I fell halfway through those ditches. Couldn't move for shit.

So I fast traveled back to the train station nearby, no big deal. But then all of a sudden, the cargo bot was all the way on the opposite side of the map at Beckly! So thinking that the cargo bot could go as fast as The Flash on cocaine upon fast travel, I hustled down there to cross paths with it. When I was no less than say twenty five feet away from it, I looked around…and it was nowhere to be found. I was confused, looking around in the air, starting to believe that the game glitched out again and the cargo bot was somewhere underground, wouldn't surprise me.

But then I saw it, way above the clouds there it was flying northeast. "Are you fuggin serious with me mate?" is what I asked myself when I saw the sheer idiocy of that height. I shot at it with bullets, lasers, plasma, heat seeking rockets, and none of them couldn't reach it. Thank Atom that it came to a good enough hill around for me to reach it, but the thing was that I chased this fu*king thing from Belching Betty all the way up near Summerville!

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I was determined to kill this thing, finally knocking it out of the sky with my freshly used Gatling Plasma. Now to note here, this keycard is the pinnacle of what makes this story what it is and why this story is named this. So with codes and keycard in hand, I head on down to Charlie and enter the missile silo. To somewhat of my surprise, I was not fully expecting the kind of defense this place would have.

Now I know it would be heavily guarded, robots and all that, but it surely pushed my skills a bunch. Especially when while fighting a LV50 Colonel Gutsy I realized that laser/plasma weapons don't work jack shit to robots. So those two legendary weapons that I brought, completely worthless. Even worse, my lever-action rifle, though can dish out some decent damage, didn't match up with the speed I need with reloading. It's been years and reloading seven to eight bullets in a 7/8 round rifle is STILL an issue.

Thankfully my Black Diamond was able to deal with most of the robots…before it broke, but RNG was on my side that day for with the death of an assaultron I managed to loot me not only an assaultron blade, but plans for it as well as plans for a salvaged assaultron head as well. Buuuuut to really start off the stupidity, I failed to mention that while I had a set of X01 power armor…I was just wearing the Excavator suit…could've really saved me from all the damage and the stimpaks I was wasting at that time.

So with two weapons rendered useless, my best melee weapon broken, my only ranged weapon nearly breaking and is too slow for this situation, all while wearing tier two power armor according to stats, I was in a bind with the added bonus of not knowing where the fu*k I'm to go since I felt like the silo was like a damn maze! After protecting walking piles of scrap made poorly by the Mechanist, I finally reached the point of getting my nuke.

I put in my card, went to the keypad and entered the code and…"Access Denied"…what the fu*k? I tried entering the code again, but it wouldn't let me and asked me for a card…but I already gave you my card! Then it hit me, you know that sudden realization when from all the confusion you finally come to the conclusion that somehow, in somewhat, you done fu*ked up…that was me in that moment.

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Turns out, I so happened to mistake a 6 and an 8 together, putting in the wrong code. And since the machine done ate my card, you know what that means? I gotta track down another cargo bot, Atom hoping that it didn't act like the last one, go back to Charlie and pray to Atom that the robots didn't respawn or worse the entire place reset itself meaning I would have to go through all those damn glitching hoops again just because I done fu*ked up by two numbers!

Fu*k that noise! Looks like West Virginia will have to wait to experience the glory of Atom for a while. So I left, went back home and drank all the liquor I had stored away and an addictol before going on a psychobuff rampage on some brahmin.

And from there, I became one of the dumbest Vault Dwellers in the wasteland, and for those who come to tell me that there was an extra keycard or something that would have allowed me to try entering the code again or some shit well…you're just proving my point

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