Fallout

Well boys, I think it might be time to retire for a while. [Kinda rant]

fallout 4 - Well boys, I think it might be time to retire for a while. [Kinda rant]
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I've played Fallout 4 almost everyday since 2017 on Xbox. I've discovered every nook, cranny, character, outcome, good and evil choice, available mods on Xbox. I've played enough to see which assets repeat, which npc spawns, and everything. Over the years, I did the best of my ability to fix the mistakes that fallout fans have pointed out with the game, and I, despite a rapid decline in mood, aimed to fulfill them. Cut content was modded back in, weapons that should be added were modded in, stories, side quests, roleplaying elements, and I even managed to simulate a law system using mods. Fallout 4 was my child, my pride and joy, my everything for so long. However, with more mods and more research, things became more repeated. NV fans have endless complaints and my Xbox can only have 2.1 GB of space to accommodate them. I sometimes wonder what I could do or could have done to make everyone happy. Modding became less of a personal thing to more of fixing a game that people said was bad. I had to mod the game to be more substantial than 3, on par with rpg aspects as NV, expansive as Skyrim, and adopt 76 features. There was just an endless need to be better, and I just needed it. I even found a way to have gunners be consequential, but all in all, there's just no way to have it be what everyone wants. It got worse when I played Skyrim, and I wanted to mod fo4 to be on par with it. I don't know if its because Skyrim was new to me so I thought everything in it was the cure for cancer in gaming, but I just kept digging and digging to look for gold, only to find myself digging a grave. I'm too scared to try NV because if its what everyone says it is, then all my time on 4 would be wasted. 150 mods is the limit on Xbox, and I know that getting a pc will just cause me to spiral more and more. They complained about not being evil, so I murdered a lot of people, but it isn't like blowing up a city or poisoning water. So I used mods for Nuka World to kill Diamond City to plunder everything. Fallout 4 just became a check list of everything people saw wrong, and I wanted to make it right so badly. I never played the previous games, and I'm scared to. If I find an aspect they have that fo4 doesn't, I need to fix around more things. I mean, can you say that the creatures in 4 were a downgrade from 3? If so, I have to mod in creatures, but they cause the game's script to have a 10 second delay. All in all, I'm just overwhelmed. I can't even get new mods because that would mean deleting old ones. I don't know if I need help or if its just in my head. They say that the only thing good about 4 was the gunplay, but other mediocre games have good gunplay, so its not really much of anything in the long run. I'm gonna get Creation Club stuff, and make a retirement plan for my character. My other Character retired to build a farm and earn money to put killing behind him. The problem with that is retirement options are somewhat limited. I could retire as a merchant, a fisherman, a mayor, a farmer, a hunter, a courier, a priest, and more, but NV would probably had infinite opportunities if it allowed you to play after the ending. So many missed opportunities they pointed out that I had to bring back with mods. I don't know what to do anymore. If I play other games, I might get scared that fo4 may not be as good as it, so I have to mod them in. I still have yet to find something catastrophically evil though, killing DC by launching nukes at it doesn't seem evil enough, so I'm failing in that aspect. I haven't even talked about weapon modding fiasco which in itself is a whole can of worms. Fo4 has no geckos and centaurs, but I can't download them due to space. Theres just so many problems and I don't know what to do. Just so many complaints and I can't fix them all. I feel dizzy just from thinking about it. I'm sorry that this was a weird post, but I don't know who to talk to about this. I don't know what to do.

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TL, DR: I'm overwhelmed by gaming in general because of my insecurities with Fallout 4.

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