Fortnite

Toxic Twine

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Owing to the numerous and ignored complaints about how absolutely horrible Twine has become I took it upon myself this evening to conduct an environmental toxicity test in Twine. If it is too toxic to support life, I will file a report with the environmental protection agency and have them send in a hazmat team. Of course we need Epic to sort the player base by age, race, temperament, sobriety level, I.Q., and heck, let's throw in a driver's license test also, but until then, player observation and vigilantism will have to do.

Methodology: All missions will be 'Quick Play" under the 'Play With Others" tab. No person from my friend's list will be allowed in my sampling expedition. I will conduct core samples of the Twine player base with a 40 foot long probe which will be inserted into the other players at random intervals during each mission. Audio and visual observations will be tracked in a small college rule notebook.

Mission One: Evacuate the Shelter. Game filled. I and one other player ran to the objective and began the pew pewing. A third player, apparently confused, showed up a bit late to the festivities after constructing 3 90's in a vertical fashion to expedite his arrival to the defense. Shelter was saved. Timer started. Constructor built an enormous and amusing pyramid to defend the shelter. One player did have an open mic. A cat could be heard meowing in the background. Eventually this player began to talk… a lot. He put up about 2 dozen gas traps. All 4 players stayed near the objective until the final battle started. Nothing got within 5 tiles of the objective. We won.

Overall Toxicity Score: 0.01 (3 90's constructed)

Farming Players: 0

AFK Players: 0

Trade Requests: 0

BR Structures Completed: 3

Mean Stuff Said/Done to Other Players: 0

Mission Two: Rescue the Survivors. Game filled. All survivors were rescued. A storm chest was shared. 2 players built some radar towers for extra credit after the survivors were rescued. Some encampments also got blown up. One person went AFK after the survivors were done. The other three farmed a bit and hit other secondary objectives. Nobody said a word in chat or on voice chat the entire time.

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Overall Toxicity Score: 0.1 (dead silence from all players for 20 minutes)

Farming Players: .075 (3 farmers after completion)

AFK players: 0.25 (AFK after objective completed)

Trade Requests: 0

BR Structures Completed: 0

Mean stuff: None.

Mission Three: Retrieve the Data. There was some confused building going on initially. All 4 players participated. Resources were wasted with wild abandon in construction of one very long wall. It appeared to sort of help the objective however. An inexperienced player edited some tiles in a manner that allowed husks an easier path to the objective, though it did not appear to have been done with intent, rather, ignorance seemed to be the primary cause. Nobody said anything. Traps were dispersed here and there. Nobody typed anything. The timer was allowed to go to about 5 minutes before somebody shot down the balloon. There was no warning about this balloon thing happening. Remarkably, it appeared nobody was the least bit concerned. Some dwarfy husks actually made it to the objective and banged on 45s placed there until somebody shot them. The mission was completed.

Overall Toxicity Score: 1.0 (lack of communication, balloon pop with no warning, noobs editing things, wasteful building, it was all pretty terrifying)

Farming Players: 0

AFK players: 0

Trade Requests: 0

BR Structures Completed: .5 (not sure what the wall was about…)

Mean things: 0

Conclusion: Well hells bells, 0 for 3 on the toxicity thing. Probably an extreme outlier event to have something like this happen. Black swan for sure. I will however remain vigilant for the good of the community. Maybe I will keep this updated. I have a few games left in me this evening…

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