Last Week: 3/28/20
Next Week: TBM
Bottom Cards Guide
Sargeras, the Fallen Titan
Well, this week’s starting off well. What the actual fuck is this? Is this some kind of joke? I don’t see a Humorous tag, so I guess it's not. I don’t think I need to explain what’s wrong with this card, as it practically speaks for itself.
Okay, there’s one thing to make a class-specific hate card. There’s another thing to make it absolute crap. Keep this in mind, these are the 0/2 Deathrattle minions that deal 2 damage to the enemy hero, not the Boom-Bots. Judging by the title, it's supposed to be a Jo-Jo reference, but this has got to be one of the worst ones.
Omg, that text. Is it too much to ask for people to use in-game cards as references before making their own shitty ones? Apparently so.
Regardless of the text, this is either a worst Steel Rager or a Chillwind Yeti.
Man, I sure do love Bomb Wrangler, but I want my boombots to be gradually generated instead of needing to use damage synergies like a big brain player would use. But that’s too slow, so lets make it a mech so that Magnetics can stick to it.
Bullshit Priest Finisher
Card got deleted, so I had to recreate it.
Plop this on turn 6 and in three turns, either win or lose the game. This card is the definition of interactivity and game changing for the wrong reasons. As soon as this is on the field, the opposing player will either A. aggro you out, therefore nullifying the effects of this card, B. Do all that it can to make sure you have less health for when this awakens, therefore leading it killing you, or C. They have no counters and just concede immediately. Say what you want about Malygos or Mecha’Thun, at least they didn’t guarantee a win the minute they land on the field.
Bottom Card Extras
Hey, you know that one neutral legendary that almost never saw play and people only remember that it exists because of Battlegrounds? Yeah, let’s turn that into a powerhouse for some reason. And don’t even get me started on its implications in Battlegrounds. You thought Poisonous Murlocs were annoying, have some Poisonous Beasts that summon more Poisonous Beasts! Cause that’s so fun to play against.
No. No, no, no. I don’t play Battlegrounds too often, but I know for a fact that this is an absolute game-breaker. Even more so at the tier it is now. Put it at tier 6, then it's balanced, otherwise, everyone will be gunning for it.
What’s this? A negative start of game effect? This can’t be right. Someone must be on drugs.
In all seriousness, the idea of a negative start of game effect to counteract a strong overstatted card seems nice, but there are two main problems with this in particular. One, some decks can simply find a way to cheat this out early (Embiggen Druid), therefore you won’t run the risk of having this at the bottom of your deck (which you probably will). Two, since this is a Legendary, it is a massive highroll getting this off of cards like Archvillain Rafaam or Brightwing.
As for the start of game effect, is it enough to compensate? No. This card will most likely be played in control decks, and they very rarely give a damn about how much armor you have. And like I said before, some decks will find a way to cheat this out.
Naia, the Infiltrator
Oh, look. It’s
r/customhearthstone’s favorite keyword: start of game. And much like the rest of these start of game cards, it’s bad. To play this card, you need to essentially gut yourself by playing only neutral cards in your deck. As we all know, they’re not the best compared to class cards. What your reward for doing this are random spells in your deck that are either really good or bad depending on who you’re matched up against and your luck. At best, this prevents you from fatigue (though if you're fatiguing as Rogue, you’ve probably already lost), and at worst, it gives you bad cards to draw. The worst part is that you can’t even trigger the effect, at all, cause this card counts as a class card. ‘BuT iF yOu HaVe It In YoUr HaNd It’Ll CoUnT,’ shut your ass up, Sam. That’s not how it works.
Because fuck Deathrattles.
The card itself is alright, but it should not be legendary. At all. That’s like saying SI-7 or Earthshock should be legendary, as this card is essentially the combination of the two.
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