Last Week: 5/23/20
Next Week: TBM
Bottom Cards Guide
Before we begin, let us take a moment of silence for a user by the name
u/Spirit-of-Depression, whose account was recently suspended, be it temporarily or permanently. RIP, you will not be missed.
Okay, brooding over. Back to dissing some bad cards.
Insta-Death Paladin Secret
1/-/- Paladin Spell
Secret: Set your hero’s health to 1 (secretly). At the start of your next turn, restore 15 health to your hero.
Wh-why? Why would you do that to yourself? Why even run this at all? To push Heal Paladin? If so, then it's perhaps one of the worst ways to do it. The only way that this sees play is with Thekal and Molten Giants which mitigates the downside. And since this is a spell, expect Yogg or other random spell effects to screw you over with.
In the same vein as the previous card, why would you even run this? Yeah, you won’t trigger any deathrattles, but the whopping 9 mana is extremely slow, especially compared to Flik or Vilespine Slayer. In fact, why is this even in Rogue anyways? It’s way too generic to fit in the class, so you might as well make it neutral. “But, Red, wouldn’t making it neutral mean that it’ll be an auto-include in every class?” No, because no class will run a 9-mana removal. They barely play any removal that costs 5, let alone 9. Even if it included, it’ll most likely be in Arena more than anything. That gamemode will make pretty much any card playable.
On the topic of removals, how about a straight up powercreep Flik that’s also neutral, and epic for some reason?
Lich King, Bolvar Fordragon
MWAHAHAHAHAHA! Feast your eyes, mortals, for once this minion awakens it’ll mark your doom. What can you do against such inevitability?
*Casually goes face and kills opponent*
AARG! Curse you, Yugi!
If I’m reading this correctly (and I hope that I am), you can basically kill your opponent out of nowhere, but only if you guess all six options right. The puzzle effect does sound interesting, the reward for completing it right is downright unfun and uninteractive. Unlike other destroy the hero effects like Mecha’Thun or the Four Horseman, you can play around it or plan to counter it. This, oh no, there is no counterplay. You’re just fucked. This just solidifies Priest as the class that either bores you to death or OTKs you out of nowhere.
You might as well make this a rogue card cause it’s the only class where this card’s gonna see play. Outside of Rogue, it’s either completely useless or a powercreep Novice Engi if you have the coin.
Oh, boy. Where do I begin with this one? You can talk about how this effectively screws over most minion heavy aggro decks all day, but it gets much worse than that. Wanna talk about screwing over aggro? Try being used by aggro, specifically Warlock and Rogue, trading their health to get a large minion. And let’s not forget about our boy Thekal. With the right hand, you can Thekal yourself, summon this minion and possibly one or two Molten Giants. That brings a stat total of 23/30, on turn 3/4.
Oh hi, Flame Leviathan. Glad to see that you got an upgrade. Nothing like auto-casting a Plague of Death out of nowhere to cheer someone up. You can pretty much ignore the discard effect cause any Discard deck will never run this unless they’re very desperate to lose.
Effect should really say "If you don't control any taunt minions, destroy this at the start of your opponent's turn."
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© Post "Bottom Cards of the Week 5/30/20" for game HearthStone.
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