Heroes of the Storm

Do not play if you’re drunk / high. It’s not funny.

HeroesoftheStorm 10 - Do not play if you're drunk / high. It's not funny.

SPECIALLY on ranked.

This happens at least once each 2 months, but the one I saw today was the most ridiculous and depressing player I've encountered so far in HotS.
Seconds after the draft starts: "Man I'm so high hahahaha wtf"
Then he proceeds to pick a completely random hero in the last possible second, after we all said "pick valla" in draft (his most played hero), then as soon as the game starts "Maaaaaan, I don't know how to play this s***, wtf, why did I pick that".
Dude then runs straight to enemy towers and start hitting it. Obviously dies.
"Oh yeah, I'm not supposed to do that hahahahaha sorry guys"
Then the first obj comes up, and we get a kill on Jaina. Dude STOPS everything he's doing and do exactly this:
"get f**** b****!
you can't do s*** now that you're dead
I don't even know what I'm playing but it doesn't matter 'cause I'm that good"
Then he walks for 1 second and stop
"guys how do I call my horse, I want to use him"
He then casts hearthstone. Obviously, he's mounted when he's back at the base.
"lol nvm guys I remembered"
Jaina is already on a lane at this point
"yo you guys see that? do they have 2 blonde b******? I killed her, I just killed her, I remember. why is she there now? is she a ghost or some s***? I'm gonna kill her again"
From that point on all he did was chase Jaina, no matter where, no matter when. Every time he died (19 in total btw) he would complain that "ghosts shouldn't have help from living people you b****" and how his hero sucks because he's dying over and over (he picked Gul'dan). He also mentioned that if he couldn't kill Jaina, he would do "nasty things" to her in bed.
We lost in 17 minutes. "Daaaaamn guys we lost, that sucks! But it was nice playing with you all, I have to say that. We'll see each other later, it will be cool!"
Then I PM'd him after the game. Not to talk, just to see his status, and for my surprise (or not), he was starting another ranked match. Oh yeah, he had 8 matches in the last 2 hours, all losses, with heroes that hardly fitted the drafts.


The last drunk dude was on a QM. He was swearing at every single person in the game, via audio, including enemies, then he was complaining about the better getting hot. He then do nothing for 3, 4 minutes, to come back saying he got "some more of the good stuff and this one is ice cold I'll tell ya". He plays for some seconds and then stops, then all types of random characters come up from his chat. Then he finally says it "f****** hell I threw up in my keyboard! how the f*** am I gonna play now?"
"Ah, f*** it" and then he continues to play presumably with all his vomit in the keyboard.
2 minutes later he dies and go BONKERS on his mic. Swearing a LOT, talking super loudly in the background how he's going to f*** with everybody in the game. His voice fades away and he never leave spawn after that.

TL;DR: Don't play if your mind is completely messed up. Turn off your computer and go do something else. You only look stupid playing in that state. You're not cool for doing that, you're not funny for doing that, you're just a depressing human being to get that wasted and then mess with other person's fun because you thought it would be cool playing in the state you are. It's not.

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