So a buddy and I were duo-slooping last night. We hadn't played together in a couple of weeks and it was awesome catching up and seeing what new cosmetics the other had gotten… you know, the usual. We laughed and drank and then decided, finally, to go do a Merchant quest… A simple Chicken-grab, to be delivered to Sanctuary Outpost in 4 days. Easy. We hoisted our sails, raised the anchor, and got underway! It took us a little while to figure out what island we needed to go to (kept stopping at random ones that didn't have chickens) but eventually we were headed in the right direction… and that's when we saw it. A small sloop, anchored at an island, off the starboard bow.
With grog in our hands, and devious grins on our faces, we turned to intercept the unsuspecting pirate, who didn't even seem to notice our approach. Pulling up literally right beside his vessel, I lept over, blunderbuss in hand, only to be faced with a tall scrawny looking fellow by the name of GeoTrackerMan. I shot him. Of course I did. We were pirates, he had loot, and as I went below decks, (stepping over his disintegrating corpse) I could hear the squawk of chickens. "He's got two of the chickens we need!" I yelled up to my buddy who immediately swam over to help me transfer the feathery cargo. We were laughing the whole time, reveling in our fortune. We even left 2 of our empty chickens coops with him as we sailed off, singing and playing music, now accompanied by a couple of more than perturbed fowl…
The night continued on. We searched for our last golden Chicken and, upon finding it, charted our course back to Sanctuary Outpost. Of course, that's when we saw another sloop… It was anchored at Crook's Hollow, not TOO far from where we were…
"Let's go see what they've got!" My buddy shouts, spinning the wheel around. It took us a good ten minutes to get there, and once we did? We didn't even hesitate. We pelted that empty sloop with cannon fire until it slipped below the waves, only to reveal that they had… nothing. Disappointed, we began to get ready to cast off, when we saw the ship's sole occupant standing on the shore line. It was GeoTrackerMan. We'd stolen his chickens and now we'd sunk his ship. At this point, my buddy and I began to feel a pesky twinge of guilt. After a few moments of deliberation, we invited the guy onto our ship, and even promised to give him back his Chickens… Like I said, PESKY twinge.
GeoTrackerMan seemed uneasy at first. He kept his pistol drawn as he swam up to our ship, and stood near the back as we went about getting ready to continue our voyage, nervously watching us. He never said anything over the mic, but as time went on, and we passed wave after wave, he seemed to ease up, even helping with the sails and bailing water out as we passed through a storm. Pretty soon we were all playing music, getting drunk and dancing. We were no longer a duo-sloop, but a trio-sloop. He steered, called out shipwrecks we could explore, even spotted a sloop we could raid…
My buddy and I laughed and said, "Why not?" We turned and soon were in a pitched battle. Sloop v sloop. Cannon balls were exchanged, splinters flying everywhere… and that's when they boarded us. I'm not gonna lie, it was a tough fight. My buddy went down and it was just me and GeoTrackerMan. We fought back to back, desperately downing bananas and reloading our guns.
But when the smoke had cleared… I was the only one left. GeoTrackerMan had died defending our ship. We'd stolen his Chickens and sunk his ship… and he'd fought to defend ours.
When my buddy respawned, we played the sad Shanty and drank to GeoTrackerMan's memory. We both said some words over the spot where he'd died, about our memories of him… which mostly involved stealing from him and/or destroying his property. We had one final sip of grog… and then we switched to one of the happier songs, and went to cash in our Chickens at Sanctuary Outpost.
What can I say? … Pirate.
© Post "The Tale of GeoTrackerMan" for game Sea of Thieves.
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