I had both my cannons pointed to the sky, I told you guys I just wanted the commendations not the loot. You replied with a "fu*k you white boy" and lit my ship up. You must have thought I died when I set my sloop to go off and then scuttled it as I was swimming. I hear you guys laughing about it "what a fu*king id*ot"
So I waited, and listened to y'all as you cleared the the fort wave by wave.. I decided to sneak on your ship and go to the crows nest hoping ya'll would kill a few sets of 5.
I thought it was a rather gun powder barrel you had in your crows nest so I took it to the bottom of your ship and waited…. I heard "finish this wave and the next wave will be the captain" so I knew my time was near. I waited until I heard y'all shoot a gunpowder skelie and took my shot at the gunpowder in ya'll hull.
Perfect timing "wow that was a chain reaction" you had no clue one of those explosions was on your ship, so I rush upstairs back to the crows nest and sit there as your ship slowly sinks.
Then I hear "the captain is up" followed by some explosions, around that time one of you spawned back on the ship "Yo what the hell our ship is sinking, fu*k it's sunk" it was too late.
So I naturally said "yeaaaa that white boy taking down a galley by himself tho!! Shoulda let me help yall"
Oh boy the insults you guys started throwing my way was hilarious. While you guys were insulting me and denying you even shot at me I'm picking you guys off. I notice one of you have the key and you were trying to take it to a hiding spot. I take a shot and you start hopping like a mad man "shit he saw me hurry back I'll try and avoid him.
Two more shots of mine missed, your hopping was getting annoying so I shot the gunpowder barrel near you. Unfortunately I died at the same I was too close and too low health. You proceeded to cuss me out in the ferry showing off your pirate legend stuff saying "you see this you you're fu*king retarded we didn't shoot you we don't worry about sloops they are easy to take out it was the skelies you dumb fu*k"
So I spawn back to my ship and notice it's close to where the fort was "fu*k yea" I think and haul ass. This wind is even in my favor it's a sign!
I rush back to the fort, grab the key and open the door. Load everything up on the sloop and notice you guys are on your way back and nearly to the island.
I know with the wind and my location I wasn't gonna out run you guys and get to a fort. So I set sail, right towards the edge of the map. I know you guys will get close on your intercept course but I go for it anyways. As you guys get closer I hear you talking more shit over the megaphone.
So know it gave me great joy when I told you guys "I'm sacrificing this loot to the red for ya'll but such cuntwaffles towards a solo sloop just trying to help. White boy out" I laughed as you guys desperately tried to catch up cussing up a storm producing more salt than the sea.
You guys even chased me into the red. So I run along the edge just far enough out that I could keep it floating by bailing. However it seems the mighty pirate legends weren't as prepared ready and sunk behind me while I was bailing.
So I decide to try it, I run up to the wheel turn it to try and get out of the red and run back down to bail. "shit" I thought, I figured I was sunk. However I managed to keep the water down enough to get back onto the map.
It was smooth sailing on my way to the outpost to turn in the loot you guys worked so hard to get for me. I thank you.
TD:DR be careful of being a d*ck to that solo sloop player wanting to do commendations, it may just ruin your day.
© Post "To the crew who sunk me at the skull fort." for game Sea of Thieves.
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