World of Warcraft

Oribos is awful by the intentional design

wow9 - Oribos is awful by the intentional design

I didn't "get" Oribos at first. I wanted Dalaran 3.0 and got this kitchen sink drain with an inn. I didn't like it when I landed and I don't now, even after realizing what it is. It was never was and will never be a capital city or place for free-willed thinking creatures to be.

TLDR: It's a staging area for big blue to send souls down the drain and no one should set their hearthstone there.

The symmetry is not designed for people

Ever been to a major airport, hospital, hotel, office, or other obscenely large building? While some are symmetrical in building shape, they are rarely the same inside. There's a central greeting area, one wing faces one way, another wing faces another, and they're distinguishable. Oribos is a glorified panopticon (
Panopticon - Oribos is awful by the intentional design meant for a security guard cough Jailer cough to watch over the inmates. Devoid of life and beauty.

The signage is terrible

Major airports put bigass signs in plain text and even color code ceilings and walkways while slapping pictures of what you want with arrow signs. You have to be foreign to the language, color blind, and not know shapes to get lost. At that point, you should not be traveling alone. Oribos has all neon blue signs where from a distance a person with poor eyesight can't tell the difference. I didn't even realize the signs over the doorways until the third day.


You can't walk down the Dalaran streets or a city street without passing by mailboxes left and right. Even large office buildings h have an internal mail system backed by those tiny In and Out boxes on desks. Where's the mailbox in Oribos? One in front of the inn, which houses criminals downstairs by the way, and one, get this, behind it. That's right! If you've never been outside the inn to swap between story and world mode, there's a mailbox right there. The trading species is less of a trading and more of a theft and collection agency.

Trading is made to be mobile

Each trader is set up to drop shop one day and bail the next. It's a flea market! Except for the traders and trainers are more of the permanent type. You always want a profession trainer. But they have a setup that screams, "I'm ready to pack up and bail by tonight." This is not their home and there is little to say they belong in their current spot. Only a few trainers have any permanent structure, like a cooking pot or forge, nearby.


Lack of an entrance and exit

Buildings have doorways that are clearly marked, by law no less, with directions as to how to get in and out of a place. A big red exit sign and "Do Not Enter" or "Not An Exit." Not Oribos. Your landing spot was a convenience, the portals were placed by you, and the flight path out is upstairs on a random platform. Just one too, can't carry the symmetry upstairs. I can't count the number of times I took a portal up and forgot which direction I was facing to fly out of that death trap. Then again, this place isn't meant for mortals, trading, housing, or anything but a sink drain for souls. A bit suspect a giant drain has areas large enough for people, though. Souls are tiny so what's with the spaces.

No internal transportation

Moving sidewalks are a blast, elevators are great, escalators are just better stairs, and being outdoors where you can drive around is even better. You can't mount in a third of Oribos, the third that people want to visit the most. Trainers, bank, inn, quartermaster, and collections — all those areas are no mounts allowed but somehow so massive people will leave, mount up, and walk around because it's faster. You'd think the traders and trainers wanting business would set up on the inner circle where the most foot traffic is going to be but they're hidden away in their hovels.

What is Oribos?

It's a sink drain that funnels souls but since the souls aren't flowing, a series of cockroaches set up shop on the edges and we're down there to clean up the mess. We got tricked into thinking it's the new home because it's geographically central between the outer regions and has an inn.

I'm waiting for big blue to wake up, flip a light switch, and grind every living creature and Broker inside Oribos into a fine pulp for being somewhere they shouldn't be. Speaking of Brokers being really suspect traders, what happened to the Ethereals?

edit: Almost forgot: Sorry all you engineers that use the robot auction house on the near opposite side of the mailbox. Remember in Boralus where you could shop, fly around a corner, and get everything at once? Or Dalaran where the box was right outside across a small street?

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