Grand Theft Auto V

Michael’s “mansion” isn’t a mansion.

GrandTheftAutoV7 - Michael's "mansion" isn't a mansion.

It's not. Not only do I not consider it one, most realtors wouldn't either. Most of them agree that a mansion has to be over 8,000 square feet, and in the white-hot LA (LS) real estate market, many won't go below 20. We know that Franklin is six feet even, from the Omega S&F mission. That means we can approximate Michael's height at ~5'9. The average stride length of a 5'9 man is 30 inches, and it takes 13 steps to cross the foyer. 30*13 is 390", or about 32.5ft. Estimating the width at 20 feet, subtracting 75 feet square for the space the staircase takes up, we have the entrance hall at 575 feet square. That puts the kitchen at ~384, (– for the island), the dining alcove at 144 (12*12), and the living room at ~950 (31*31), as well as the total hall area at 120, we have a total square footage for the first floor of 2,077 square feet.

And then there's the second floor. We can assume that the unusable bathroom just off the staircase is 5*8, an average size for a full bath, Jimmy's room at 14*12, Tracey's at 15*10, the total hall at (6*36) + (5*5), the usable bathroom at 4*8, the unusable master bathroom at a slightly larger 6*10, and the master bed at 15*15, and finally the closet at 6*7, to get a square footage for the top floor of 918 square feet.

Add it all together and you get a working square footage of 2,995 square feet. Add 5 feet for a possible addition error, and because I like round numbers, to get 3,000.

Already, there's a problem. The lowest societal square footage is 5,000 square feet, and even if we're generous and include the garage (24*24) to get 576, for a total of 3,576 square feet, we're still well under the mark. Not to mention that the square footage is a measure of the finished floors of the home. It does not include land around the house, or unfinished attics or basements. We see no iteration of either.


And then there's the actual number of rooms. At an insanely small 3 bed 2.5 bath, it doesn't have the proper bed count (>4). Michael's house is also built in a European architecture style. Many mansions would have multiple kitchens, dining rooms, and living rooms, as well as a game/rec room, all to serve guests.

There is one last hope. Quality of land. A mansion can still be a mansion if it's pumped with luxury, usually lavish grounds and acres of land. However, Michael only owns an acre. The front grounds are luxurious, but simple. His house has strong, fancy, double doors, multiple balconies, and intricate patterns. But it's the backyard that's the big ticket. A large swimming pool and outdoor hot tub, a fountain, and a tennis court. All of these combined with the multiple car parks and reasonably luxurious front grounds would be enough-if it weren't for the much larger houses all around him. Even the property next to his has a bigger house. All of the Vinewoods Hills' houses-even Franklin's- is bigger. The rest of Rockford Hills has completely private drives with sprawling constructions.

But it all really comes down to opinion. I don't think it's enough, but you might think different. And all the square area was rough estimation. I am probably wrong on at least some of it. So please, don't blow this post up with hate mail.

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