Hey hunters. I recently finished testing out each of the 14 weapons in World and having done so, I felt as if I should write up a quick guide for anyone who might be interested in knowing how specific weapons play. That includes new players, people looking to get into playstyles that they haven't tried before or just people who like to hear about what others think about their choice of weapon. Anyway, let's get right into it.
- SnS: Shield and Shield
The SnS is a godly defensive weapon. Not only can you defend yourself from attacks from two directions at once, but you have slingers on both arms. I didn't even care that I didn't get a sword of any kind, I just spammed slinger ammo at the monsters until they were dead. I think I gave Rathalos an epileptic seizure with flash-pods.
- LS: Long Shield
The Long Shield is an extremely mobile, devastating defensive weapon. It's got excellent range meaning that you can block attacks even if they wouldn't have hit you in the first place and with the foresight block, you can block attacks before they even happen, violating the very rules of causality and confusing the shit out of your enemies. I used the foresight block to prevent Nergigante's dad from jizzing in his mum, retroactively erasing him from reality. This weapon is an absolute must-have.
- GS: Great Shield
This shield can prevent anything from getting to you. Personally, I use it to prevent existential dread from setting in whenever I'm trying to sleep and to avoid having to deal with my problems by deflecting them to one side where they sit quietly, festering and only getting worse the longer that I ignore them. But it's alright, because I have my Great Shield. I don't need to deal with reality, I can just sit under its protective canopy and deny deny deny. Everything is alright. I'm fine. I'm OK.
- IG: Insect Gun
Do you like spiders? Do you like swallowing cockroaches in your sleep and scaring away your peers by being constantly surrounded by hordes of flies and maggots? Do you enjoy watching swarms of locusts stripping the entire continent bare and ripping the skin off of the world's wildlife, reducing them to nought but bleached bones and nibbled-on carcasses? Do you love causing massive ecological collapses and rendering the vast majority of the planet's species extinct, including but not limited to: platinumfish, petricanths, aptonoth, pukei pukei, teostra, wyverians and humans? No? Oh. Nevermind then, I guess this weapon isn't for you.
- DB: DPS Blades
The first time that I equipped these, my game crashed. When I booted MHW up again it had been renamed to "Hunter World" and all of my investigations and quests had disappeared. Turns out my character blacked out and murdered literally every single monster in the world. Without any monsters to hunt the Research Commission had decided to concentrate its efforts on studying the New World's endemic life like fish and marsupials. It's just too bad that everything was buried under a mile-thick layer of compacted gore and the ocean was too rancid with blood for any aquatic life to survive in it. I stopped playing once all of the NPCs had died of bacterial gangrene.
- CB: Charge Bus
The Charge Bus is an absolute powerhouse, capable of bringing huge amounts of damage to bear against any monster on the battlefield. It doesn't matter whether they're in the air or on the ground: the weapon comes with a special palico ability called "stunt ramp" which lets you hit flying monsters with ease. Earplugs III would be a must if not for the fact that the snapping of monster bones and the sound of your bonnet crumpling up didn't drown out the sound of the screaming schoolkids in the back.
- HH: Holy Handgrenade
I used to have trouble fighting the Beast of Caerbannog but as soon as I picked up the HH I started taking it down with just one attack. Use this weapon if you can't beat that fight either.
- HM: High Mobility Multipurpose Wheeled Vehicle / Humvee
Now, I know what you're thinking. "CherryNomad, isn't the Humvee just a car?" And the answer to that is yes. It's just a worse version of the Charge Bus. Thankfully, you have insurance on the Humvee, meaning that whenever it gets totalled you earn ten times as many zenny as it cost to craft in the first place. It's a shame that you can't use that mechanic to farm money, though, since if you do it too many times the insurance company takes you to court for insurance fraud. There's currently no mechanic in the game to simulate the legal battle, although I've heard it through the grapevine that Capcom is going to release a new title in 2021 called "Monster Lawyer". Looking forward to that, although I'm not looking forward to Great Jagras' kids filing a lawsuit against me for murdering their parents some seventy two thousand times.
- LNC: Lunch
To be honest, I thought that this was a joke weapon at first. I thought that it wouldn't be able to deal any damage. BOY WAS I WRONG. As it turns out, every single monster in the game has a very specific set of allergies that you can take advantage of. Who knew that Xeno'Jiiva was deathly allergic to peanuts? Murdering babies by force-feeding them poisonous foods is a completely sane, ethical thing to do… right? It's a shame, though, that Odogaron's only allergy is to pickles, which refused to stay in the bloody picnic basket. I'm not talking about Deviljho by the way: I was referring to my pet labrador, Pickles.
- LBG: Lost British Gentleman
"lost" in that he was looking for a Tesco's and accidentally ended up in the weapon box. He's a good lad. We had tea and scones; turns out he wants to leave his office job and pursue a career in movie acting. As soon as I mentioned that we were in the New World though his eyes glazed over, he pulled out a musket and a British Royal Marines scarlet tunic from inside his tophat and stood up before declaring that he was "off to search for Christians and gold!" before marching into the forest with a curt, polite "Tally ho!"
- BOW: Biological Weapon
This weapon makes the Rotten Vale's effluvium look like bottled fucking air. 10/10 would watch lavasioth choke on his own saliva again. It also made my character into a fugitive from the international community and a certified war criminal which I thought was going to be the end of my playthrough but thankfully, at the last moment, I found a way to frame The Handler for the whole incident and got her castigated in The Hague and sent to Monster Guantanamo Bay in my place.
- HBG: Heavy Bean Gun
The HBG is less about putting down some dakka and more about force feeding your foes baked beans until they literally rupture from all of the methane built up inside their systems. The most memorable kill that I got while using this weapon was when I fed Anjanath a whole roomful of beans, rendering him obese and giving him type-2 Diabetes and forcing him to give up his dreams of becoming a professional soccer player. You'll never complain about a lack of firepower either when you've got access to special ammunition like wyvernfart and the legendary wyvernqueef.
- GL: Gun License
You think the big honking swords that Monster Hunter advertises are what the game is all about? Listen to me, you've all been lied to. What the game is about is putting a fifty cal into Vaal Hazak's head at two miles and watching him drop. It's about laying down a storm of tracers into Legiana's dumb face and finishing him off with a frag nade. It's about flashbanging Great Girros and John-Wicking his groupies with a Smith and Wesson before jamming the barrel of a Mossberg into his mouth and giving the Rotten Vale a fresh coat of paint. It's too bad that I can't get my hands on it, though: apparently I'm not "responsible enough to own firearms" and "a known fugitive from the law wanted for several accounts of vehicular manslaughter". Pssh. Stupid bureaucracy.
- SA: Supportive Axe
"You can do anything, so long as you put your mind toward it!" "I believe in you!" "Your parents would be proud of you if you hadn't buried them in your backyard after hacking them into pieces with me you sick, disturbed fucking animal!"
😀 Thanks Supportive Axe!
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